We all criticise, even ourselves!

Career and employment

On 8 September, I invited my friends for coffee in my place after our usual Sunday afternoon walk. One of the things we discussed was how politicians always criticise quickly their opponents without providing alternatives. French Pres. Macron’s choice of Prime Minister attracted not only criticisms but also demonstrations. In last month’s US presidential debates, Harris and Trump traded blows. Harris was criticised for laughing too much; who didn’t? I did when Trump said, “In Springfield, they are eating the dogs. The people that came in, they are eating the cats. They’re eating – they are eating the pets of the people that live there.” (Interesting read – Trump repeats baseless claim about Haitian immigrants eating pets by Merlyn Thomas & Mike Wendling. BBC News https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c77l28myezko).

I should not have laughed because that false assertion can cause prejudice, victimisation, and division. Surely, the targeted people didn’t laugh.

When we hear the word “criticism”, we associate it with negativism. However, any dictionary describes “criticism” as an opinion or judgment about the good or bad qualities of someone, something, or an activity. Criticism isn’t only destructive. Constructive criticism provides useful feedback for improvement.

You don’t have to be a psychologist, philosopher, or any relevant pundit to know that when we criticise people negatively, we anger the latter and make them defensive.  They don’t change their behaviour to please us or respect us more; it’s more likely the contrary. How do we know that what we give or receive is constructive or destructive criticism?  When we’re criticised in a manner meant to belittle or hurt us, it’s the latter. In this situation, we should stay calm, breathe deeply, and pause before responding with factual words in a polite tone. Some people are stuck in a rut, reflecting more about themselves and their beliefs than those they criticise.

We all experience criticising and being criticised. Hence, how/whatever we do, we’re likely to be criticised. We even criticise ourselves openly and in our minds. How many times have we said to ourselves, “If only …”, “It’s my fault …”, “I should have …”, etc. 

 “Criticism is something you can easily avoid by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” ~Aristotle

Whereas, constructive criticism should be everyone’s business. If we want to provide positive criticism or feedback, it has to be with good intentions and supported by specific examples delivered in a friendly manner. This might include having a respectful formal or informal discussion or brainstorming session to find out ways for the person to improve.

Examples of constructive criticism:

  • Your PowerPoint presentation had a lot of useful information, but adding more colourful visual examples will make it more mesmerising.

Rather than “Your PowerPoint presentation was dull” (or boring).

  • Your report has some strong arguments, but it can be improved by changing passive sentences into active ones.

            Rather than “Your report is poorly written”.

  • I have noticed that you sent the email later than agreed. Can we discuss any challenges you’ve been facing and ways to manage better our deadlines?”

            Rather than “You’re always late; you missed the deadline again”.

We ought to be prudent when using “always”. When we hear “always,” we may feel criticised negatively regularly, making us defensive rather than receptive to feedback.

To communicate or converse more effectively, it’s better to use specific, factual language that acknowledges strengths and areas for improvement (i.e. constructive and productive approach).

Quiet Vacationing: Why employees shouldn’t lie?

Societal Issues, ,

Three weeks ago, I happily spoke with a friend about my son’s recent university graduation. Our conversation expanded to occupational differences and life-work balance. When I got home, I received this link from her (https://www.theguardian.com/money/article/2024/may/22/quiet-vacationing-why-workers-are-sneaking-off-on-holiday-without-telling-their-boss). I was taken aback yet not so stunned to know that some people lie about working when they aren’t, i.e. they’re on holiday.

Employees lie to their bosses for many reasons, such as because they haven’t been given time off from work and feel the need to be away from it. The Internet has abundant articles on the importance of taking time off from work: increased productivity, enhanced company culture, increased retention, lower stress, improved mental and physical health, and boosted morale.

However, not all employers understand this, and it is the main reason given by liars, which is a “no, no” justification. Walls have eyes and ears; hence, managers and colleagues eventually find out about such lies. Often, the quiet vacationers’ change in behaviours, e.g. being unusually secretive or defensive, provides a clue. As well, they may inadvertently post photos and messages showing they were definitely not at work. “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”- Mark Twain (1835-1910, American writer)

With the acceptability of teleworking, the other concern is not whether employees work in the office or elsewhere but about their productivity for the entire time they claim they are working. Some pretend they’re working by using applications that do the task for them; others by signing on to virtual meetings while doing personal chores or watching a movie.

If you can’t take time off for urgent work reasons, then get rid of your phone after your normal working hours and on weekends, i.e. simply disconnect and relax at home. If you need longer than a weekend or don’t want to disclose information about your holiday, you can inform your boss that you’ll be on staycation.

If you’ve taken time off or gone on vacation (US)/holiday (UK) without getting it approved by your manager or through a proper channel, then you’ve lied and disengaged from your organisation. This is a red flag for you and your employer, and there should be an honest conversation about the former’s role and responsibility in the company and the latter’s duty of care to employees.

“I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.” – Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900, German philosopher)

Don’t wait for tomorrow what you can do today

personal and social development, politics and governments, Societal Issues, Values and Principles

Have you heard or used Benjamin Franklin’s quote, “Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today”? This is a useful food for thought particularly because we live in a fast-paced, high-tech world. I’ve recently said to an acquaintance, “If I were you, I’d do it now, as later can become never” — easier said than done.

Early this year, I went to our local city hall to query about voting for the French elections. They gave me the necessary form, which I intended to fill in within a few days. Unfortunately, it soon ended up at the bottom of my to-do list.

As a French citizen by marriage, all I had to do was submit the completed form and attach a document of residence in the municipality where I wanted to vote.

In the European Parliament election held on 6-9 June 2024, the far right defeated President Macron’s party, causing the latter to call a snap legislative election on June 30 and July 7. I had not yet submitted my voter’s registration form, so I was late to be allowed to vote.

While working for Australia’s Queensland Government, I participated in the writing of green and white papers; hence, I know that politics are not distant from our daily lives. Politics are everyday issues, from national budgets, taxes, the number and composition of migrant intake to changes in school syllabuses.

Politics are the things we need and want, the things we believe and like or otherwise, the things we know and don’t know, the things we fear or worry about, and the things we face or can happen to us. This write-up, however, is not about politics but the importance of pro-activeness and promptness.

If I had submitted the completed form and the required documents immediately, I would have been able to vote. It was a critical election with the left-wing alliance winning the most seats in the French Parliament, followed by Macron’s centrist Ensemble Alliance party, averting the National Rally (far-right) from a majority government. A country’s government contributes to making or breaking peace and democracy in our world.

With the Olympic Games still underway in Paris, I can’t help mentioning my admiration for all Olympians. Many of them begin training in their mid-teens; some even in childhood. They don’t wait for tomorrow…

How can we carry out tasks that we have been avoiding? Perhaps less thinking and more doing? Why not start with the least difficult part? What about being philosophical – i.e. It has to be done, so I might as well do it now?

Resurrecting dreams and old projects

personal and social development, Societal Issues, sports and hobby, Values and Principles

Have you lost a dream along the way? Did you shelve it because of unforeseen challenges? Do you have projects that have become dormant due to time constraints or shifted priorities? Did you know that revisiting a dream or resurrecting an old project can be a profoundly rewarding experience, as it provides fresh insights, renews passion, and gives a sense of accomplishment?

When reviving an old project or exploit, we’re reconnecting with past ideas and aspirations, invigorating motivation. While the idea of resurrecting an old project is exhilarating, it has its challenges. One of the main hurdles is its potential for outdated or irrelevant content. What was once innovative or necessary might no longer be applicable now. Also, revisiting a dormant project may bring back memories of past failures or frustrations; overcoming these requires resilience and optimism. Though ignoring previous setbacks is a hard thing to do, it’s worth a try.

I have recently revisited a project that came out of a family challenge a decade ago. A relative said I was too pragmatic and not creative enough to write non-fiction books. Well, in 2014, I wrote “Future Perfect”, a novel about a woman without a known past who battles against secrecy, insecurity, and the unexplained kindness of others.  A few weeks ago, I revived it after reading the Conversation’s 3 June 2024 article by Kate Falconer entitled, “You can now be frozen after death in Australia.  If you get revived in the future, will you still legally be the same person?” It has been 10 years since Future Perfect was published, but the story has never been relevant today. Except for its cover, nothing has been changed.

Perfection doesn’t exist; if it does, there’s never enough time to achieve it the first time, but there’s always time to go back to improve it (There’s always room for improvement).

The first step to reviving a dream is to do activities related to it, e.g. changing a career, learning a new skill, or saving money for a trip. Revamping an old project is a journey of rediscovery, growth, and reconnection. With perseverance and an open mind, one can turn a “dream-only thing” and an old or unfinished project into a testimony of imaginativeness, resourcefulness, tenacity, and self-satisfaction.

“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” —C.S. Lewis (British writer, literary scholar, and Anglican lay theologian, 1989 – 1963).

Olympic Torch parade outside our residence. I could hardly open the door of our building because of the crowd.

What are awards for?

personal and social development, society, Values and Principles

Companies, organisations, and educational institutions give awards to associations and individuals in various fields, e.g. arts and entertainment, business, sports and hobbies, science and technology, and community service. On 27 April 2024, I received an award from my undergrad alma mater. I’m always for the underdog and sceptical of who gets noticed and who doesn’t; thus, I had to soul search throughout the ceremony. I looked for things which probably weren’t there, such as subjectivity and bias; were deserving candidates overlooked and less deserving ones chosen? The criteria and decision-making process read that evening didn’t avert my thoughts from the observation that most recipients were doctoral degree holders.

I regretted not nominating our dance troupe teacher for the Arts and Culture Award, which didn’t have financial value but would have given her the recognition she merits. I still remember her words over four decades ago – “back straight, hands in a lateral position, smile, and move gracefully”. She inspired me to choreograph and dance at the Queensland University’s International House functions years later.

Returning home to France from the Visayas State University, there was an email from an acquaintance whom I had helped many times with his work and personal projects. I immediately thought, “Oh no, not him again; he didn’t even buy one of my books, either as a token of his appreciation for my help or to improve his English”. Then, I remembered the award, which is meant not only to inspire others to strive for excellence but to remind us that success should be based on service to others without expecting something in return. Yes, we – humans, are vulnerable to quid pro quo (something in return for what we have done, i.e. a favour for a favour) that should not be! This award is an additional guide to my behaviour.   

Awards provide commendation and encouragement for individuals and groups. It’s primordial for the selection process to be transparent, fair, and devoid of self-nomination. Though the latter indicates self-determination and high self-esteem, it can taint credibility and promote self-gratification.

We shouldn’t wait for award ceremonies to give recognition to colleagues, employees, students, volunteers, etc. For instance, saying thank you for a job well done is a form of recognition that encourages motivation and efficiency.

“One person can make a difference, and everyone should try.” – John F. Kennedy (35th president of the United States).

Shall we carry on with Labour Day?

Employment, Societal Issues, Values and Principles


Today, known as “International Workers’ Day” or May Day”, is dedicated to workers’ achievements; it’s a public holiday in many countries, e.g. Australia and France. In the USA, Labour Day is on the first Monday of September. Demonstrations and campaigns for workers’ rights are part of the celebration.


In the 1980s-90s, in Australia, I participated in the annual Labour Day march in Brisbane. It wasn’t only the time for me to rest from my paid job but to show solidarity and appreciate the significant contributions of workers and the labour movement in improving working conditions. I can’t remember someone questioning me about its relevance or the media’s scrutiny of it being a public holiday. Lately, there have been remarks that it is just another excuse to stay home. How many organisations and individuals use this day to recognise and honour the labour movement’s contributions to securing workers’ rights, fair wages, and safe working conditions?


Have working conditions improved since its birth in 1886? It depends on where you are. Then, there’s the industry. “Technology is moving faster than companies can design and scale up their training programmes”, the World Economic Forum’s Future of Jobs Report (weforum.org) discloses. According to this report, AI is a crucial employment disrupter; other factors include the green transition and geo-economic conditions.


​Generative AI will increase productivity and innovation in high-income countries​. In contrast, developing countries will continue to lag and experience increased unemployment. Demanded know-how will become even more critical​; hence, will there be equitable resourcing for skills development? It’s the old story again—the rich have the means to better themselves. Will Labour Day observances and marches impact the workplace undergoing employment shuffles due to technological changes?


​How attractive and useful are labour​ unions​ in our current digitalised world? Are their tactics and demands ​reasonable and justified? ​If we had to change ​”Labour Day​” to reflect our modern day, what would that be?​ (Labour force includes the employed and unemployed people who are working or willing to work​, while workforce consists of ​individuals who are engaged in some work and excludes those who are eager to work but ​can’t find ​or get work​).


Labour Day is a reminder of the ongoing struggles for social and economic justice — wherever you are and in whatever industry you’re in (high-tech or no tech)!

Hope and Expectations

Societal Issues

A fortnight ago, my student mentioned a book she had read about not having hope and expectations because they cause disappointments. This made me contemplate, as “hope” is one of my favourite words. Hope fuels the human spirit to persevere amidst challenges and ignites positivism and pro-activism. If you want something to happen, you work for it.

Expectations, on the other hand, are projections of our desires. They are suppositions based on guidelines and principles. Joy is experienced when an excellent result (i.e. one that exceeds expectations) occurs. However, expectations breed disappointment when beliefs and assumptions are unmet.

Hope and expectations intertwine. They help us endure our trials and triumphs, propelling us on our journey on Earth. Hope fosters a sense of possibility, inspiring us to aspire beyond reality, whereas expectations provide direction and purpose toward a desired outcome.

I hope the war in Ukraine will be over soon. Pundits expect it to end through diplomatic means and not through the barrel of a gun.

It is crucial to balance hope and expectations because they form the foundation upon which our dreams are built and realities are shaped. With such balance, we can navigate challenges and strive for betterment and fulfilment.

You’ve heard the phrase, “Hope for the best, prepare for the worst”, which means to desire a favourable result while getting ready or making provisions for the worst possible outcome. As a noun, hope can have an adjective before it, e.g. “best”. “Our best hope is that we may be able to identify and avoid those factors that cause it to fail” (Cambridge English Corpus https://dictionary.cambridge.org/example/english/best-hope).

Can we replace “hope” with “wish”? Does the latter cause disappointment, too? To “hope” is to look forward to a potential future outcome. I hope she will get better soon. To “wish” is to focus on desires related to the present or past. “I wish you a happy birthday” (Here, the word “wish” means “hope you have”). “Hope” is more optimistic and forward-looking, while “wish” can imply unavailability or regret. I wish she hadn’t got respiratory tract infections. (Wish + past perfect tense. Hadn’t “gotten” is also correct) ).

 “There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow”. – Orison Swett Marden (https://www.azquotes.com/quotes/topics/hopes-and-expectations.html).

So what if we get disappointed? Sometimes, disappointment makes us stronger. On the other hand, it’s cruel to insist on giving hope where clearly there is none, as this causes dispiritedness and resentment — things that make our lives more complicated than they already are.

Connecting people from different cultures

culture, immigration and multiculturalism, language, Societal Issues

“No culture can live if it attempts to be exclusive”. – Mahatma Gandhi

The Festival of Migrations and Cultures, one of Luxembourg’s most important annual events organised by the Comité de Liaison des Associations d’Étrangers ( CLAE), took place last February 24-25. There were more than 30,000 visitors and 400 stands. I heard at least a dozen languages spoken by people who visited my English Language Lovers booth.

The multiculturalism of Luxembourg (known as the Grand Duchy), with about 660,000 residents, was showcased. Luxembourg is the seventh-smallest country in Europe and has borders with Belgium to the west and north, France to the south (where I live), and Germany to the east. Its official languages are Luxembourgish, French, and German. It is one of the four institutional seats of the European Union (EU); the others are in Brussels, Frankfurt, and Strasbourg. The EU institutions have 24 official languages; English is one of them.

Last week’s event reminded me of Australia’s multicultural festivals (or even private gatherings and national celebrations that look like the United Nations’ party).

In 2018, the New Internationalist (NI) listed these ten steps to world peace: start by stamping out exclusion, bring about true equality between women and men, share out wealth fairly, tackle climate change, display less hubris, make more policy change, protect political space, fix intergenerational relations, build an integrated peace movement, and look within – peace starts with you.  (https://newint.org/features/2018/09/18/10-steps-world-peace accessed on 10/02/2024)

NI’s suggestions are needed more than ever, notably with what is happening in Ukraine and the Middle East.

Connecting with people helps change thoughts, perceptions, and actions; multicultural gathering is one practical way to do this. Why? Because:

  • It helps us better understand the differences and similarities between people.
  • It promotes open-mindedness among different groups of people and dispels negative stereotypes.
  • It provides opportunities for the mutual sharing of traditions and cultures.
  • It encourages the exchanging of information and perspectives, leading to a peaceful neighbourhood, workplace, and society.

“Peace is not just the absence of conflict; peace is the creation of an environment where all can flourish, regardless of race, colour, creed, religion, gender, class, caste, or any other social markers of difference.”— Nelson Mandela (1918-2013, first Black president of South, i.e. from 1994 to1999).

*The world has evolved; race doesn’t exist, but ethnicity does. Gender identity is wide-ranging from masculinity, femininity, and transgender to agender (genderless or neutral – neither male nor female nor a combination of male and female).

How are you? I’m Busy!

Societal Issues, society, Values and Principles

The year 2024 has started with challenging projects and deadlines for me. Like many people who wear several hats, I wish I had more than 24 hours in a day or more than two hands. Thus, last week, I had difficulty responding to “How are you?” It would have been easier and simpler to reply “busy”. Since I felt it was a bit unfriendly, I said, “Alright, and you?” Did they really want to know how I was or what was going on with my life? 

Benoit has told me he doesn’t respond to “How are you?” because it’s just a greeting and doesn’t mean something. If that’s the case, why say “How are you” when you can do it with “Hello” or “Hi”? 

When I say “How are you?”, I mean it as a greeting and wanting to know if the person is well or happy. Therefore, I’m pleased with any of these responses: I’m well, I’m great, I’m okay, I’m alright, and I’m fine. Most people are polite and continue the conversation with “How about you” or “And you?” The chatter can prolong depending on your relationship with the individual (colleague, neighbour, friend, etc.). 

I’m glad I didn’t respond “busy” to “How are you?” because what does being busy mean? Busyness is a choice; you are either busy or not. It’s a relative word and can be positive or negative. Merriam-Webster defines the adjective “busy” (ˈbi-zē) as engaged in action (occupied), full of activity (bustling), foolishly or intrusively active (meddling), or full of distracting detail. (https://www.merriam-webster.com › dictionary › busy).

“Busy” can sound more negative than positive, and if you believe in the law of attraction, it’s one of these words that should be used with care and in moderation, plus the tone. According to the law of attraction, negative thoughts bring negative results into a person’s life, and so with positivism. It is based on the belief that thoughts are a form of energy, and positive energy attracts success in all areas of life, including health, finances, and relationships (Scott, E. 2022. What Is the Law of Attraction? How Your Thoughts Can Influence Outcomes in Your Life. Https://www.verywellmind.com/understanding-and-using-the-law-of-attraction-3144808).

Therefore, instead of “I’m busy”, why not “I’m working on/I’m involved in/I’m tied up”? I sometimes say, “I’ve lots to do but not snowed under”. If someone wants you to do something, try this phrase — “I’m afraid I don’t have time to do it now” or “Yes, when I have a minute”. 

Saying you’re busy can be a writing on the wall or a self-fulfilling prophecy. Busyness (noun; busily – adverb) can lead to self-negligence, unrealistic goals, anxiety, and fatigue that may cause burnout. It can become an addiction, and any form of addiction is toxic. 

No one should be busy not to engage in self-care, i.e. having sound and enough sleep, eating nutritious food regularly, exercising, participating in group activities, etc.

“Half an hour’s meditation each day is essential, except when you are busy. Then a full hour is needed”.  – Saint Francis de Sales (Https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/busy-quotes).

(Before getting up every morning, while still lying down, I focus on a particular object or subject for calmness – this is meditation for me. We don’t need to be seated on the floor with our hands resting lightly on our legs to meditate. It can even be done standing).

Prioritisation of tasks prevents busyness.

“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning”. – Albert Einstein (1879-1955, German-born physicist)

Societal Issues

In 2023, Artificial Intelligence (AI) dominated societal debates, from how it impacts employment in some occupational sectors to its questionable use in the modelling industry. As a language teacher, I’m not immune from the significance of AI’s rapid evolution. In my writing courses, I don’t discourage adult students from using translators or AI, as they maintain doing this to save time. Instead, I focus on how they can improve their AI-generated texts, pointing out the choice of words and punctuation, reminding them to check the type of English (UK or US) and adapt this to the one their company or organisation uses, and forming or adding phrases to sound human or courteous but impactful. Most importantly, we discuss intellectual property rights, reputable resourcing, and referencing.


A year and a half ago, I started writing a novel. With the arrival of Chat GPT (AI software and platforms show up every day), I decided to shelve it. There are already novels helped by AI or even entirely written by it, and many more will be on the market. How do readers differentiate between human and AI-generated stories?


I enjoy writing, and in 2024, I’ll venture into a non-fiction illustrated/pictorial book that is entertaining (fun to read) yet informative or educative. Wish me luck! I admire people with a good sense of humour, a gift I don’t have but am determined to acquire as a skill. I hope to achieve this objective before AI exceeds my ability to laugh and empathise.


It’s a coffee table book about using English in our globalised and digitalised world. I need anecdotes, jokes, photos, and illustrations related to this topic. All contributions will be acknowledged (i.e. you decide on your full legal name, nickname, or website link that will go with them). You can contact me through the comment section here. I’m the only one who can see your message and email address, which are deleted after I’ve read them).


How about you? What did you let go last year? What are your challenges in 2024?


I wish you, my readers, and your loved ones good health, peace, love, joy, and prosperity. May you’ve more giggles than grumbles this year!